Screenhead

There are times when you watch a movie that it feels like it was handled by somebody in particular.  Most George Romero or Steven Spielberg or even Michael Bay movies have that certain feel about them, and you can tell, even as you watch them, that this movie was handled by that person.

2012 feels EXACTLY like a Roland Emmerich movie because, let’s face it, we’ve all been here before.  It’s just gotten a LOT bigger since the last time.

This time, as it turns out, the Mayan calendar that’s gotten so much press over the last few months or so was exactly right and the end of the world as we know it starts up on December 21, 2012.  And for a writer and father, who’s been somewhat estranged from his family of late, the whole world will quite literally never be the same again.

If you saw The Day After Tomorrow, ironically, you’ll have about a thirty percent head start into 2012 because it’s almost the EXACT SAME MOVIE.  Both will feature scientists who catch on to things way ahead of the rest of the curve, but no one will believe them for a while until it’s almost too late, then there will be a whole lot of horrendous things happening that are far, far, more outlandish than anybody’s worst case scenarios.  Sprinkle in some bad science, top it off with some schmaltzy family drama, and boom!  You’ve got yet another half baked Roland Emmerich disaster movie that will probably make its shooting budget back if for no other reason that people LOVE to see stuff go boom.

Idiocracy fans, take note–at this rate Ass will be in theaters summer 2015.

Seriously though, this isn’t really a BAD movie.  It’s a bit overlong, sure, and don’t even try to find this movie’s science on a map because it just plain old DON’T EXIST, and don’t even get me started on Roland’s big middle finger to greedheads everywhere who think they can buy their way out of disaster.

But there is plenty going on here.  You’re almost certain to be entertained.  Even I was entertained.  There’s no long term value in a movie like this, but for a pleasant way to kill off two and a half hours with explosions and drama and a number of car jumps so large as to make Bo and Luke themselves have car envy (the first time I saw John Cusack JUMP A LIMO all I could think was “Well sir, right about then the Duke boys knew they was in a heap o’ trouble”.  Try it; it’s fun!), there’s not much better.  And by the way–it’s AWESOME that Woody Harrelson’s in this.  I’ve got a whole new respect for this man.

The Screenhead Ten Scale, meanwhile, shakes its head with a sardonic grin and hands this low-brow disaster epic a six out of ten for its sheer fun factor, even if its plot is a load of steaming garbage that’s about a third of a ripoff and its science so lousy even a fourth grader could knock it into a cocked hat.

I think we’re all still smarting from Jurassic Park 3, a lump of molten suck so thick and putrescent that it still hurts to even think about it years later.

So it’s not exactly a dose of good news to hear that the plans for Jurassic Park 4 are moving on as if nothing were wrong.  Joe Johnston, right now, is looking to direct, and apparently the script is already well in hand, because he’s been talking about how “great” the script is.

Apparently, this time around, the fourth one is going to start a new trilogy (!) and will be a completely different direction for the series.  If they want to do completely different, of course, what they’ll have to do it keep people off that stupid island to start with.

Me personally?  I give good odds that Wu’s stupid “lysine contingency” was as big a screw up as his “oh, they can’t breed” line of bullhonkery, which means that, chances are, a few of those original Isla Nublar dinosaurs–or maybe a few site-B Isla Sornas–got loose and are currently terrorizing Brazil.

We’ll have to wait a good long while before we find out what’s what, though.

Steven Spielberg made it perfectly clear to the trades that he is not giving up on Lincoln.

Spielberg wants to launch his Lincoln opus.  But as most large budget movies go these days the project was postponed by financial and location problems.

The Lincoln story focuses on the president’s torment over the length and toll of the Civil War. Tony Kushner is revising the script.

Spielberg is currently working on remaking Harvey with Robert Downey Jr.   This should be an interesting turn. Downey playing the man who sees an invisible rabbit.  I just hope he can tone down his energy to play the lead character.

(Source)

Now here’s a really exciting piece of news, especially for anyone who likes a good pirate movie.  Michael Crichton’s last book, Pirate Latitudes, is going to be adapted into a movie by no one less than Steven Spielberg.

This isn’t the first Michael Crichton movie adapted by Spielberg–he tackled both Jurassic Park and its sequel The Lost World, so you can be pretty sure that he knows how to handle a Crichton novel.  Even better, he’s got a personal high opinion of Crichton’s work–check this out:

Anything that Michael wrote, Steven would be keenly interested to read. But without Michael knowing it, or even me knowing it, it turns out Steven always wanted to direct his own pirate film.

This isn’t surprising–considering how heavily pirate-themed The Goonies was and the somewhat piratical nature of the Indy film, it’s definitely a logical step for Spielberg to go to piracy as a theme.  Got to admit, though, I’m definitely looking forward to this.

Seriously, when I first heard that Steven Spielberg was looking to handle the Halo movie I was just all sorts of perplexed.

One, I thought that role had already been offered to District 9’s Neil Blomkap.

Two, seriously…what’s Spielberg doing handling video game translations?

Three, aren’t video game translations supposed to suck out loud?  What if this one turns out to be, you know, GOOD?  Granted, this isn’t so much a video game adaptation as it is an adapation of a book based on a video game (the movie’s script is slated to center around The Fall of Reach), but that’s really just semantics.  At its roots, this will be a Halo movie.

I’m not sure this will work out, but one thing’s clear, the whole thing will probably prove to be pretty interesting before it’s all said and done.  Whether or not Spielberg can make a video game movie is up for grabs, but considering his array of successes, I’d figure he’s got a chance.  Might be interesting to have a GOOD game movie to talk about for a change.

Former ER star Noah Wyle will be fighting aliens for Steven Spielberg, marking his reunion with the legendary director. All this is being done for TNT’s untitled alien-invasion plot that is being written by Robert Rodat from an idea he conceived with Spielberg.

The pilot is set shortly after aliens have wiped out most of the human population. Wyle is set to play the leader of a group of soldiers and civilians who struggle against the alien forces.

Wyle, so far, has starred in four films for TNT: the Librarian action-adventure franchise, which spawned three movies, and Pirates of Silicon Valley.

The pilot is being produced by DreamWorks TV.

Speaking with Empire Magazine, Peter Jackson revealed some details on the upcoming Tintin motion capture project, noting his involvement in both the first and the second film.

He is producing the first, with Spielberg directing. However, a week of reshoots will be done in June in his Wellington studios to fix any issues that need to be fixed from the original month-long shoot earlier this year.

Jackson said: “We’re kind of co-directing. I mean, we are co-doing it. Steven’s been on set with the actors for the last six weeks, and I was only there for a week. So he’s definitely directing the first in a way that I’m not" says Jackson.”

He admitted that while the base story for the first film will be based on The Secret of the Unicorn, it will also use elements from Herge’s other books to flesh things out.

The first is due out next year, with the sequel expected out in 2011.

The greats just keep dropping these days. After the saddening news of playwright behemoth Harold Pinter, fans of the written word will be saddened by the news that this week saw the demise of author JG Ballard. He died at the age of 78 of prostate cancer.

Ballard’s career as a writer started in the 60’s, where coming from an avante-gard mentality, began writing sci-fi books, such as The Drowned World (envisaging the melting of the ice caps, a concern still felt today by the likes of Al Gore). Ballard quickly became associated with rather educated depictions of dystopian futures. Ballard went on to delve into the pshychological and physiological effects that our increasing reliance on tehcnology had, especially in the powerfully written Atrocity Exhibition. His controversial novel Crash, was adapted into a film by David Cronenberg, an adaptation that sadly took a distanced approach to the subject material and left a bad taste in the mouth of the viewers.

Ballard’s big break was his fictionalised account of his early youth, in which he attempted to escape the Japanese assaults on Shanghai and China. Its power and heart was enough to prompt Steven Spielberg to adapt Empire of the Sun, which started the career of Christian Bale.

Ballard continued writing novels about the present and future into his later years, mostly to critical acclaim. He left behind him a style of of storytelling and subject matter that would inspire everything from Blade Runner to the Matrix to Minority Report. Indeed, I’ve always been surprised that more of his novels weren’t adapted into films, something which Hollywood should rectify if they’re searching for intelligent, engaging science fiction stories. One of his novels, High Rise, is currently in pre-production.

The trailer doesn’t say much about the movie. Perhaps the title, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, says it all.

Steven Spielberg’s The Adventure of Tintin: Secret of the Unicorn has been concealed in secrecy during pre-production. Principal production has begun in Los Angeles, which is set for release in 2011 as the first installment of 3-D motion capture trilogy.

Daniel Craig and Jamie Bell recently signed on to star in Tintin.  Bell is playing the titular character, a brave young reporter who relentlessly pursues a good story that places him in sphere of high adventure.  Craig plays the despicable Red Rackham.

Other cast members include Andy Serkis, Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, Gad Elmaleh, Toby Jones and Mackenzie Crook.