It may not surprise many of you to realize, as I sit here at the depths of three in the morning writing this up, having braved the terrors of a quite thoroughly packed 12:01 showing of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, that I had something of a crisis of conscience writing this one up.
After all, I said to my screen, balefully, and sucking back a cup of hot green and white fusion tea against whatever diseases the numerous little hellions that were in that theatre were carrying, was there anyone out there who was going to actually NEED this movie reviewed for them? Surely pretty much everybody has already made their decision–most of the people planning to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince had likely bought their tickets weeks prior, and those without plan to see it refuse to do so on religious grounds, convinced quite thoroughly that Harry Potter is enslaving the youth of America and pushing them down a dark path of satanic witchcraft, wicca, and voting Democrat.
Anyway, the plot: Harry’s back for yet another year at Hogwart’s, learning all about potions and wands and assorted mystical hoodoo whatnot. Meanwhile, the vague creeping evil that is Lord Voldemort still pretty much refuses to show itself except through his minions. This time, not only does Harry and company have to defend the school and its inhabitants from the advances of the dark lord, but they’ll also deal with all those typical teenage things like crushes, fending off aggressive suitors, and countering the occasional misdirected love potion. Describing the plot in much more than these vague terms would require massive spoilers, because this plot is very much dependent on its specifics.
I’m rather convinced Harry’s going for his master’s or something because he’s been there several years. Even the characters are getting a little bored of it–there’s one really great sequence where one of the teachers (I think it’s McGonagall but no one mentioned names much) gave an exasperated sigh and asked, why, whenever something horrible happens, you three (meaning Harry, Ron and Hermione) are always involved. Imagine my shock when I muttered virtually the same line that Ron gave back, saying that they’ve wondered the exact same thing.
Well, Ron, buddy–so does the audience.
I personally have several problems with this movie, especially as it relates backward through the canon (for instance, why does Harry never use that expecto petronum or whatever any more? Does it only work on Dementors? You’d figure if you’ve got this really uber spell you’d actually bust it out on occasion, especially when you’re in a fight as Harry seems to be every twenty minutes or so.). But chances are my problems simply stem from the fact that I’m going in cold on this, having never read the books.
However, the critical fact remains–this is not really a bad movie, but rather, this is a movie that preaches only to the choir. If you’re not already enamored with Harry Potter and his world, chances are you never will be. There are few fence-sitters here, and so, you’re either desperate to see it or desperate to avoid coming in contact with it.
So what does it get on the ten-scale? Easy. A seven out of ten. It’s beautiful, the environments are great, the actors are at least tolerable even if the plot, much like the lost continent of Atlantis, no longer appears on any map. For that handful of you undecided, it’s worth a shot.
