Screenhead

Remember how, when I wrote about The Haunting of Winchester House, how GREAT I thought it was that The Asylum was finally getting out of the mockbuster trend and no longer Asylumizing movies?

Sadly, that’s all gone as The Asylum releases 2012 Supernova, which is pretty much taking on 2012.  The only problem is that, of course, The Asylum doesn’t have anywhere NEAR the cash required to make those kind of special effects.

The plot, though, is actually pretty interesting–two hundred years ago, a star exploded and launched an enormous wave of radiation.  Sadly, two hundred years ago was apparently during the War of 1812, because it’s about to hit in much-popularized 2012.  So now a group of scientists is out to launch a whole load of nukes into the upper atmosphere so they can augment the Earth’s natural anti-radiation shielding.

I’ll admit, though, that The Asylum clearly does the best it can with what it has to work with.  What baffles me, though, is that they try to take on this monster projects with the most minimalist budgets you can imagine.  It’s like trying to eat a Ho-Ho the size of a Buick, and doing it with a knife and fork.

The result, however, of trying to load a bunch of AA batteries in a space designed for a Diehard is that the whole thing has this vaguely repetitive feel in which a simulated disaster happens, then we react to that disaster, then another one happens, and so on and so forth without much in the way of an overarching plotline to hold it all together.

There will be plenty of thrills here–watching people try to escape from things blowing up and whatnot–but are these thrills going to be enough to hold the overall picture together?  Well, that’s your call, in the end.

The Screenhead Ten Scale, meanwhile,  isn’t so impressed and thus hands the newest Asylum knockoff a fair enough five out of ten.  it clearly tried, but it just couldn’t tackle what it set out to try.

I love the sound effects and music in 2012 movie trailer.  The sound is quiet and eerie with the rhythmic tone beating slowly. This is what Roland Emmerich envisions the ending of the world to look like based on the apocalyptic events that were predicted by the ancient Mayan calendar. It’s pretty awesome to watch, a no-brainier of the world imploding and exploding at the same time.  The movie opens November 13, 2009.

I always wanted to drive a car off an airplane. My adrenaline would go so high and I’d feel so fantastic.  It wouldn’t take much strength because I’d drive the car so fast, so as not worry if I’d careen all over the snow.  Wow!

Actually, this film clip from 2012 is pretty darn wacko and cool.  It looks so real with all those cars flipping off the airplane and airbags puffing up.  Go Cusack and friends!

The poster is okay.  I’ve seen enough posters of this movie to get the idea that the world is going to end come 2012.  Mayans are right and we should do something about it.  In the meantime, I am going to the movies!  2012 opens in November 2009.

Three detailed and glorious banners came out this week for Roland Emmerich’s end of the world, blockbuster movie. The banners show key landmarks of the world being destroyed by Mother Nature.

We have the Rio de Janeiro’s Christ the Redeemer statue, a very familiar icon, which is being shown here and at Empire online you can see the other two — USS John F. Kennedy about to wipe out the White House in Washington D.C. and Los Angeles on the verge of a total and complete wash out as the San Andreas Fault rips a gigantic seam down the whole freaking disaster. The movie stars John Cusack and opens Friday, November 13, 2009.  I hope you feel lucky that day.

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Opening in theaters on November 13, 2009 stars John Cusack, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Amanda Peet, Oliver Platt, Thandie Newton, Danny Glover and Woody Harrelson. The epic adventure is about a global cataclysm that brings an end to the world and tells of the heroic struggle of the survivors.

“No matter what happens, we’ll all stay together.”

Get your calendar out and start filling in the dates for the major studios release dates in 2009 as they finalize openings for the year.

Sony has pushed back the release of Roland Emmerich’s blockbuster 2012 from July 10 to November 13.

Guy Ritchie’s Robert Downey Jr.-Jude Law  highly-anticipated Sherlock Holmes has been pushed back about a month from November 13 to December 25.

Twilight sequel New Moon is set for November 20.  on that date.

Sony moved up the release of Hugh Grant-Sarah Jessica Parker romantic comedy Did You Hear About the Morgans? is set for December 18.

Nancy Meyers’ untitled comedy is set to open December 25.

Other movies planted for Christmas Day are The Princess and the Frog and Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakuel.

James Cameron’s action-adventure Avatar opens one week before Sherlock Holmes on December 18.

Universal moved the release of Sacha Baron Cohen’s Bruno from May 15 to July 10.

The Hangover will open June 5, one week earlier than its original release date of June 12.

Universal announced Wednesday that it is taking Emma Roberts  movie Wild Child out of its May 8 release date this year. No new release date was mentioned.

Of course, this is subject to change and not all the movies set to open in 2009 have been listed.

I had to share this is awesome 2012 Teaser Trailer, waves coming over the Himalayas.  “The end of the world…” Roland Emmerich’s style. He’s gathering a large group of people to tell the tale of the end of the Mayan calendar.  I’ve marked my calendar for the release date — July 10, 2009.  

Talking to MTV News, Woody Harrelson revealed that he has landed a starring role in 2012, Rolan Emmerich’s upcoming apocalyptic disaster movie.

He says that his character is a "sort of modern version of the Greek Cassandra, a prophet nobody believes." Adding that he’s the "guy who’s been talking for a long time, the whole world thinks he’s crazy."

Harrelson joins John Cusack, Danny Glover and Amanda Peet in the film which begins shooting later this year in Vancouver.

The Hollywood Reporter successfully does its job and reports that The Visitor writer/director Thomas McCarthy has landed a role in Rolan Emmerich’s upcoming apocalyptic movie 2012. He will play the new boyfriend of Amanda Peet’s character – the ex-wife of the lead character played by John Cusack.

The film will begin shooting this August in Vancouver. Thandie Newtown, Danny Glover and Oliver Platt are also set to star. McCarthy is also working on a new script that he hopes to direct.

In related news, the script for the film was recently reviewed by the guys at Latino Reviews, and it ain’t pretty.

An in-depth, spoiler-filled review of the storyline for Roland Emmerich’s $200 million 2012 project has been posted on Latino Review, the site that magically gets access to scripts of major upcoming films. The review reveals that the disaster movie will focus on severe storms on the surface of the Sun that has a grave effect on Earth, causing earthquakes, tsunamis, dust clouds and whatnot.

The reviewer is not kind, however, as he notes that the film is full of clichés, one-dimensional characters and “heavy handed attempts at emotion and morals” that it “borders on self-parody”. I don’t know if it’s too late for a rewrite, but the film certainly needs one it seems.