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Jeff Gannon/Egghead from the old Batman show/Guckert or whomever presses his duplicitous yet well-toned ass against the outer limit of his allotted Warhol 15 with an appearance on Real Time With Bill Maher. Fish in a barrel hilarity ensues.
Gannon/Guckert Appears On ‘Real Time’ [Dem Bloggers]
Don’t click this link. It’s nothing but some pictures of collapsed arseholes.
Seriously, don’t click it.
Really.
Don’t click the link.
Why are you still reading this?
Bosje bloemen [jaggle]
A preview site for card trick instructional video series Generation Extreme with Brian Tudor. “Warning: Don’t buy this DVD. Almost no one can actually do the stuff you’re about to see…Minimum recommended daily practice time: 4 hours…. Throughout your training you’ll destroy five or more decks per day.”
We pity people who try to sell magic as edgy, as even their best efforts are futile given the fact that they are only ever one shy step away from Doug Henning.
Generation Extreme with Brian Tudor [Penguin Magic]
Via Monkeyfilter
The nice policeman gives a gun lecture to the children. We don’t want to ruin the clip that we’re linking to by describing it, but we will say we love the balls it takes for him to keep referring to himself as the only one pro enough to handle the weaponry.
Teaching the Kids Safety [compfused]
( Freaky Leon .gif via built from scratch )
Fred Durst is suing Gawker, with which we are only loosely associated. We here at Screenhead, which is not Gawker, would just like to take this opportunity to say we agree with Mr. Durst 110% and support his decision fully. What that other site, which is edited by a completely other whole different person, a stupid, crazy person who we don’t like and never talk to— what ever it was that site did was inexcusable, and we had absolutely no part in it. Our linking to that site is not our choice. Furthermore, we were legally and clinically dead when the link to that site was posted for us, and we have the medical bill and ambulance fees to back that claim up.
We here at Screenhead —and we’re speaking for ourselves here, as we’re not Gawker— would like to acknowledge the fact that Limp Bizkit is, of course, the seminal band of our generation, and that we have all of your albums, even the last one. We’d also like to say that, while we normally don’t swing this way, we think you, Fred Durst, are possibly the sexiest man alive, and once science allows men to birth children, we’d be honored if you would consider us to be allowed to do so for you. We love that insolent, untamed, “screw off, society!” baseball cap thing you invented which Black people stole from you, and we envy how you say the things we only wish we could say ourselves like “fuck” and “motherfuckerz” and “I hope you know I pack a chain saw, I’ll skin your ass raw.” Most of all we love that you managed to take the word “nookie” out of the hands of Pat Robertson and other senior citizens, bringing it back down to the streets where it damn well belongs.
We here at Screenhead, which we’d like to point out once again is not Gawker, wish you the best in your proceedings, and we look forward to your next album.
Fred Durst - Touch My Balls And My Ass And Then Sue Gawker (we didn’t choose the title for this post, and we apologize unreservedly to you for reprinting it, Fred. We are merely following orders.)
“Billy’s essay assignment causes him to look at the world around him. What will he be when he grows up? Will Billy turn out to be a ‘fudge-packer’ like his father?”
Life is rough all over, kid.
Billy’s Dad is a Fudge-Packer [Gay.com ] In QuickTime.
The video we’re linking to here explains itself in large red letters before it gets underway, so we’re not going be redundant, however we will say that our answer is…
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“I like big Bibles I can not lie/ You Christian brothers can’t deny/ When a girl walks in with a KJV*/ And a bookmark in proverbs, You get stoked. “…
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So far, 840 total quick small videos of goofy people injuring themselves through mishap or ill-conceived stunts. Pretty neat if you’re A. very, very bored, B. angry, or, C. Spike…
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Cow Bondage. Well, the cow was asking for it— you can’t wear leather head to toe out in the country without expecting trouble. Also, evidently some people want to see…
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Herein lies the tale of Lemmiwinks, the heroic analy-inserted hamster from TV’s South Park that just wants to see his way out of the dark hole he has found himself…
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Finally, someone has put some tits on the internet. Someone really should have a small biology talk with the people behind this thing. Maybe these people could help. Or maybe…
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A picture show, in which roommates learn the value of personal space, and Kleenex. Sort of like Where’s Waldo, only with Hasselhoff cheesecake. Where is Eric’s Sock? [mavweb.mnsu.edu]…
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“…But my mission is to explore strange new worlds, and I think I will start with your bum.” Well, this shouldn’t be. No, this shouldn’t be at all. In QuickTime….
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Coudal is ready for some peace and quiet : “After reading a story in the NYT, Jim’s wife Heidi came up with a method to fight back against the obnoxious…
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(At this time, Richey personally thanks ALL HIS FANS, from EVERYWHERE, ….all of your support is so totally worth it. You fans out there are so totally awesome, both online…
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Unfortunately that 
